Like racoons, I like drama, trash and a lot of eye make-up so you can bet my ears pricked up when I read one of the Jonas Brothers and a Hollywood starlet were having an acrimonious divorce.

This couple are Joe Jonas (he’s the middle one who, Wikipedia tells me, plays lead vocals, rhythm guitar, tambourine) and the beautiful and very talented actress Sophie Turner. I never watched Game of Thrones past one season, largely because I thought it should have been titled A Compendium of Boobs and Sexual Violence. Likewise, I literally couldn’t name a Jonas Brothers song with a gun to my head but I am, like many writers, curious to the point of gratuitous nosiness about human messiness. And so I grabbed my metaphorical popcorn and got scrolling.

Sadly, like a racoon on a binge I came out feeling, well, a bit grubby to be honest. After four years of marriage and two daughters born two years apart, Jonas filed for divorce. It’s worth noting that he might have done this at any time but did so while Turner was out of the country working and away from her children. Cue the "bad mum" PR machine grinding into action with TMZ reporting a source close to the couple stating: "‘She likes to party, he likes to stay at home. They have very different lifestyles," saying that Jonas had been looking after their kids "pretty much all the time" even while on tour.

Except, Sophie Turner is not away from her kids partying up a storm. In fact, she has been in the UK working on her starring role in forthcoming ITV crime series Joan. If she was caring for the kids while he was on tour do we think we’d hear a peep about it or declarations that Jonas was an unfit father?

This "bad mum" narrative has been pervasive in the press despite Sophie having said during a pandemic interview on Conan O’Brien’s talk show: ‘I’m an introvert, I’m a homebody… if I could stay at home all day I would, so this is great for me.’ Add to this that Sophie has been living in Jonas’s world for the duration of their marriage despite saying last year in Elle, "I miss England so much. The people, the attitude, everything. I’m slowly dragging my husband back. I really love living in America but, for my mental health, I have to be around my friends and my family." Staying in a country you’d rather not be in for years for your husband and kids? Not exactly the actions of a selfish, out-for-herself mother.

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Don’t worry though, Joe Jonas corrected the wild speculation about his wife’s mothering abilities using his enormous, literal, platform at Dodger’s Stadium during a concert where he addressed his fans on stage: "I just wanna say, look: If you don’t hear it from these lips, don’t believe it." So not exactly the most resounding defence of his wife of four years or the mother of his children.

But let’s not forget that Jonas, when aged 19, reportedly asked a13-year old, Gigi Hadid, out when he met her at the Grammys and when she refused he gave his number to her mum. This is not a man probe to stopping short of getting exactly what he wants.

Perhaps I feel especially for Sophie because I am imagining how the narrative would go if I divorced my husband (something I usually only fantasise about once a month while the PMT beast is on my back). I am a working mum. My husband takes on the primary caring duties. I also have a chronic health condition that means I have to measure my physical exertion carefully.

On a recent flight to Poland our son did an almighty poo - as kids are wont to do when there is limited space and a circular air-con system. My husband took our son for a change because our two-year-old has the build of a rugby player and changing his nappy is now the equivalent to a WWE bout that I simply don’t have the strength some days. When he came back from the toilet, having done a very normal parenting job, the near-standing ovation he got from admirers was only rivalled by the disgusted, judgemental looks I got for sitting down and having a read and a coffee while it was happening. As an aside, I do wear one of those "hidden disability" Sunflower lanyards but it usually only results in people speaking slowly and loudly like a middle-aged, 1980s tourist ordering from a waiter in Tenerife.

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On the question of whether Sophie Turner did have a few nights out after successfully completing a big project while her kids are safely with their dad? Yes she did. And frankly, big deal. Have you ever been on a mums’ night out? I mean "mumsy mums", the kind who puree their own baby food, are practically trained Montessori teachers and are already planning their toddler’s secondary education. They go at it like mid-noughties Lindsey Lohan (no judgment); I’ve been to more peaceful illegal raves than mums' nights out. And why not? These women have spent their week thinking only of their kids' needs. They know they are safe, comfy in carefully selected organic tog duvets and their favourite character pyjamas, the babysitter is extortionate and has been through more screening processes than your average MI6 agent. Doesn’t that mum deserve to get dressed up, have a drink, dance, get some deep-fried food and catch a taxi home singing to the radio?

I’ll tell you something else about mums’ nights out. We don’t have our phones clutched in our hands for selfies. We’re constantly clicking open that bright little window of responsibility to check the sitter has messaged or called. If a man goes out with his mates, drinks, has a good time and then gets up at 6am in the morning to make his kids breakfast and take them to Swimming Club despite a hangover sent from Satan… well, he’s called a saint for ‘babysitting’.

So, yes, I’m team Sophie all the way on this.