The Beefcake 808 Crow Road Glasgow

IT’S already one of those golden winter afternoons when the sun bursts over the Crow Road and into the Beefcake Cafe drenching us all suddenly in a bright whiteness. Even though Sunday afternoon’s closing time of 4pm is long past and the owner and staff are now cleaning down and shutting up they’re still answering questions as we pay.

“What is that,” I ask the guy while nodding towards a very large contraption behind the counter that looks like its for squeeze drying very voluminous gentlemen’s knickerbockers. A sheeting machine, he says, For making dough and pasta. “Ah, is there anything we ate this afternoon that was made on it,” I wonder looking about the counter with it’s freshly baked-in-here-today display.

The Beefcake I should say at this point is tucked into one of those backwater streets that parallel the monster Anniesland junction outside - but are not part of it. Getting here from the Clyde Tunnel therefore involved some head-achingly hard sat-nav-following simply to avoid the peril of being swept away forever in the wrong lane. Yet walk in from the traffic madness nearby and it has a calm, relaxed Victorian shop-front feel with a very high ceiling, a lofty mezzanine and tucked away underneath: this open kitchen stuffed with proper, modern, hard-core kitchen machines, baking racks, loaves of relaxing bread.

In fact we laughed earlier when Debs’ Shakshuka style baked eggs with peppers, saffron, tomato and feta arrived. It was accompanied by four heels or the ends of loaves making us wonder if they had been reluctant to cut a fresh loaf open for the very last customers at this very latest lunchtime of the day. Funnily enough two huge thick, fat slices of brown bread came with my bowl of cod and smoked haddock fishcakes and dill mayo.

The fish cakes were a triumph anyway; light, almost crumbly, reasonably smokey but made with lovely dry potato and sitting on a crunchy, tangy, wintery salad too. The bread may have been unnecessary but I’ve got to say once tasted, the chewy crusts, its perfect texture it became a scramble around the table to finish it all off, crunchy heels too. Now a bowl of roasted vegetables with Feta Cheese may not sound the most promising meal, but the Shakshuka - simply because of a very good stock, rich and deep flavours - is completely finished off too. By me. Well almost.

We decide some of the peppers would have been much better sliced much more finely. Anyway, the man replies to my question about whether I ate anything made on the sheeter by saying: “The buns you had,” referring to the two that I ate after I had finished the fishcakes. Ah, of course, they were Chelsea Buns rolled and yet made with a great yeasty dough that was loose enough to sprawl comfortably into the square edges in the baking pan.

“I make Chelsea buns like those,” I lie, mine are not nearly as good, prompting a moment of awkward double confusion when the owner thinks I too run a cafe somewhere. My Chelsea buns are not as light or as artfully perfumed with flavoured sugar syrup either, but for a moment I like to think we man-bond in a baking way. Okay maybe not.

Now I forgot to mention Luca had a Croque Monsieur that was nothing like those ski-slope cafe horrors but was more of that great bread, thick ham and a blow-torched bechamel that puffed itself up appetisingly. I don’t know if this helps to get a feel for the place but Souad Massi was singing Ya Kelbi as we ate.

Obviously I shazammed it. On atmosphere alone the Beefcake feels right but there’s also a refreshingly serious drive to do things very properly in the kitchen that pays off even in the simple things we ate. We notice they’re open in the evening for dinners at the weekend and we agree that on today’s late lunch showing we will definitely be back.

Menu: Proof that cafes are often where the real cooking and baking are taking place these days; simple dishes, done right. 4

Service: Very relaxed and comfortable with the customers, refreshingly no over the top patter either. No patter at all. 4

Atmosphere: Bright and airy double height Victorian shop front with a mezzanine and a proper if crammed and bustling kitchen, felt good. 5

Price: Big breezy main courses of fish cakes or Shakshuka were £8, cakes and buns much cheaper. Good vale. 4

Food: Lovely crumbly fish cakes, properly dressed crunchy salad, everything made freshly and with care and baked bread. Excellent. 8

25/30