Cat's pyjamas

THE story about the BA plane flying to Edinburgh instead of Dusseldorf by mistake reminds us of previous airport stories in The Diary including the sales manager who told pals on social media: "A mate overslept and had to get on a flight within an hour, so he shoved all the clothes on his bed into his suitcase. When he got to the airport he found out he'd packed his cat.”

A belter

YOUNG Scottish comedian Daniel Sloss once told of the fun he and his younger brother had when they went on holiday with their parents. Explained Daniel: "As soon as our dad started taking his belt off to go through the security scanner at the airport we would look alarmed and shout out, 'No, dad! I'm sorry!'”

Landed with him

A READER once knew a stewardess who moved a lady passenger to a new seat to get her away from a drunk sitting beside her on a flight from Spain to Glasgow. As the plane approached Glasgow Airport, the stewardess asked if the lady wanted to return to her original seat for landing. "Oh, I suppose I had better go back and sit beside my husband," she replied.

In the pink

WRITER Deedee Cuddihy's book Only In Dundee included a story from The Courier which began with the memorable line: "A man wearing a pink cowboy hat and covered in fire extinguisher foam was discovered straddling an airplane when police responded to a possible terror alert at Dundee Airport in the early hours of the morning.”

Early bird

GLASGOW Airport will be busy next week with the Easter Holidays. It reminds us of the reader at the airport who heard a chap with an elderly lady beside him who was scanning the departure board remark: "We're so early mum, they haven't even heard of your plane.”

Bottled it

FORMER Walker Cup golf captain Colin Dalgleish, when he flew back to Glasgow from the US Open at Merion, told us: "I knew I was home, and definitely at the right airport, when the very first thing off the carousel was a bottle of Irn-Bru.”

Bit tied up

AIRPORT security can be really stressful at times. An Elgin reader once told us: "I was in Houston International Airport when I encountered the problem of whether to take off my shoes and belt. There was a considerable build-up of passengers all with the same predicament. The problem was soon resolved when a lady security attendant shouted out, 'If you are over 70 years of age there is no need to take your shoes off as you all have enough problems tying your shoe laces’."

Having a ball

FORMER Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson was stepping out of a limo at Glasgow Airport after a series of engagements in the city and promptly tripped over an uneven surface on the pavement. Immediately, a passing traveller joked that Sir Alex had been fouled. "You should know me better than that," Sir Alex told him."That was a penalty.”

Cowboys and indians

ONE of our favourites was the story told about the late, great Scottish folk singer Hamish Imlach who was at Glasgow Airport with fellow folkie Josh Macrae to meet Soldier Blue singer Buffy Sainte-Marie, Ramblin' Jack Elliott, billed as "America's Roving Cowboy", and Blind Gary Davis, the blues great, who were flying in for a folk festival. Naturally Hamish and Josh went for a few libations first. Finally at the arrivals gate Hamish asked Josh: "How will we recognise them?" Josh replied: "A blind black man, a Cree Indian and a cowboy? If we don't recognise them, Hamish, I'm giving up drink.”