FOOTBALL and politics are often the most volatile of combinations but during PMQs they were used humorously by the main protagonists with Maggie May making clear she still believes she can, despite the political turbulence, get a result on Brexit.
As the Red Scousers at Westminster were still on Cloud Nine after Liverpool’s extraordinary victory against the minnows of Barcelona, it was Jezza who first picked up on subject to tease the beleaguered PM.
“In view of Liverpool’s amazing performance last night,” said the Labour leader, “perhaps the Prime Minister could take some tips from Jürgen Klopp on how to get a good result in Europe,” he quipped to laughter.
Not bad from the chief comrade but the Tory head girl had just as nifty a response.
“When we look at the Liverpool win over Barcelona last night, we see that it shows that when everybody says: “It’s all over and your European opposition have got you beat; the clock’s ticking down, it’s time to concede defeat,” actually, we can still secure success if everyone comes together.”
The Conservatives berserkers loved it and roared their approval; the ones still on side, that is.
But Tory discontent is never far away in the Brexit wilderness.
Arguably, the most disloyal of Conservative backbenchers, Andrea Jenkins, adopted a patronising tone to tell her leader she had “tried her best”.
Plunging the knife in, she explained: “Nobody could fault or doubt her commitment and sense of duty but she has failed. She has failed to deliver on her promises. We have lost 1,300 hard-working councillors, and, sadly, the public no longer trust her to run the Brexit negotiations. Is it not time to step aside and let someone new lead our party, our country and the negotiations?”
The Maybot rose and, empathising with the councillors who were sacked by the voters, told her colleague: “May I also say to my honourable friend.” There was a rumble from Labour. “No, wait for it,” declared the PM. “Actually, this is not an issue about me and it is not an issue about her. If it were an issue about me and how I vote, we would already have left the European Union.”
Of course, for many Tories it now is about her.
Elsewhere, before Ian Blackford launched into another tirade against a Westminster “stitch-up” on Brexit, the Highland champion had what can only be described politely as a parliamentary moment.
In following suit to earlier remarks from Thezza and Jezza to welcome the arrival of the royal baby, the SNP’s Bagpuss declared: “I also congratulate the Duke and Duchess of Wessex.” A collective grumble of disbelief ran around the chamber as MPs shook their heads before Mr Blackford muttered quickly: “Sussex.”
But the damage had been done; the own goal had been scored.
No doubt, Prince Edward momentarily raised an eyebrow in his wife’s direction at the chief Nat’s confused revelation. But, in Mr Blackford’s defence, for an MP representing Skye the distant lands of Wessex and Sussex can be easily mixed up.
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