Herald Diary: The super supper solution

Er, no thanks

THE Herald reported on a contest for the best jokes at the Edinburgh Fringe, and a number of readers were underwhelmed. Said Tich Frier in Kinross: “They reminded me of the standard ‘vote of thanks’ reference, ‘Your speech was both funny and original. Unfortunately the original parts weren’t funny and the funny parts weren’t original’. Cruel but that’s comedy for you.”

Baking bonus

THE dozen or so contestants for this year’s TV extravaganza Great British Bake-Off have been announced. Sadly, no Scots it seems. But as one reader told us: “This year’s competitors say they are absolutely delighted to be on the show as it means they’ll have access to eggs and milk after October 31.”

Skip to it

OUR story about the woman asking for a Twirl in a Motherwell shop and the owner spinning round in front of her reminded a Lanarkshire reader: “When I was doing some renovations at home, I called a hire firm and told the lady that I wanted a skip in my driveway. ‘Would you like a dance around your front garden, too?’, she replied, I suspect not for the first time.”

Pyramid selling

OUR tales of meeting folk abroad who know Scotland reminded reader “Mac” Mackie of visiting the pyramids in Egypt where a local was standing by to help people climb over a small wall. Says Mac: “He asked where we were from and I said, ‘Eighteen miles from Glasgow, Scotland’. He put his hand inside his galabeya, produced a letter, and said, ‘I’ve a friend in Coatbridge’. I’ve often wondered how many pockets and how many letters he had inside that galabeya.”

Cleaning up

A GLASGOW reader tells us she is delighted her teenagers have gone back to school. During the summer holiday, fed up with picking up her son’s clothes from the bedroom floor, she announced she would charge him 50p for every item she picked up. When she announced at the end of the first week that she’d picked up nine items he handed her a fiver, told her to keep the change, and said: “Keep up the good work.”

He borrowed the fiver back the next day.

Elders and betters

THE obituary in The Herald this week of Alasdair Auld, the former Director of Glasgow Museums and Art Galleries reminded the Rev Donald Macleod: “Alasdair was also a fine church elder. Within the eldership of that congregation at the time there was one by the name of Dan Young. Whenever the list of elders was produced they would appear alphabetically by surname. Observed one wag, ‘There can’t be many Kirk Sessions where you begin Auld and end Young!’”