Coatish concerns
IN tomorrow evening’s STV documentary Billy Connolly: It’s Been A Pleasure, celebrity chums and the Big Yin himself reminisce about his career in what is being billed as a final farewell.
Meanwhile, another of Billy’s buddies, novelist Kathy Lette, has revealed what she adores most about her friend, explaining he’s “not only wildly witty and deliciously self-deprecating, but without any self-pity”.
When Kathy showed concern about Billy’s Parkinson’s diagnosis Connolly shrugged off her worries. “I also have Anorak-sia Nervosa,” he told her. “An irrational fear of ugly raincoats.”
Boyle busted
NOT all comedians are adored like Billy. Ricky Gervais has been receiving flak from fellow funny man Frankie Boyle, who says he finds some of Gervais’s material insensitive.
Diary reader Callum Young is confused by Boyle’s remarks and says: “Frankie calling out Ricky for inappropriate material is like David Beckham chastising Cristiano Ronaldo for being too vain.”
Drumming up sales
TALENTED Diary correspondent Gordon Wright has been a keen musician most of his life, playing guitar and also dabbling in percussion. He even bought a set of bongo drums at auction this year, though later regretted his decision and placed an advert on Gumtree hoping to sell them.
Yesterday morning he received a phone call from a bongo enthusiast. Price was discussed (£20); also condition. The deal was about to be sealed when the buyer enquired about mileage.
Gordon then discovered that Mazda produce a camper van called – you guessed it – the Bongo.
Lord only knows
A SPIRITUAL thought from reader Edward Evans, who says: “I believe in God 12.5% of the time. Does this mean I’m an eightheist?”
Rhyme time
AFTER reading the Herald Diary’s latest book, Owling With Laughter, Carl Williamson was suitably inspired to write a verse celebrating the magnificent volume, which we now quote in all its poetic splendour:
“Owling With Laughter was a right hoot,
Had me in stitches,
And rollin’ aboot,
It would not be a surprise,
To see it win the Booker Prize.”
Nice on ice
OUR readers continue to strive to do better. Alfred Grant says his wife informed him this week that her New Year resolution is to be a nicer person. She then said to hubby: “And I’m assuming yours is to lose that double chin.”
Exit, stage left
ON the subject of the year’s end, reader Norman Johnstone believes it’s best to think of 2020 like a panto. “Because eventually it’s behind you,” he says.
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