Bruce encounters

OUR politics increasingly has a sepia-tinted, retro vibe to it. Alex Salmond on the scene again. George Galloway’s fedora hat bobbing into view.

Even an ancient King of Scotland has returned to have his say, courtesy of Hollywood actor and serial Robert the Bruce impersonator Angus Macfadyen, who is once again performing as the Bruce in a voiceover for an Alba Party video.

Not all of Angus’s fellow thespians are impressed. On social media, River City star David Paisley harrumphs: “I know the Alba Party are seen as regressive. But I wasn’t expecting to be dragged back to the 1300s.”

Park life

STROLLING with her husband in Rouken Glen Park at the weekend, Sheila Roberts kept passing groups of middle class mums and dads participating in exercise classes. (Or ‘boot camps’ as the fashionable fitness fiend describes such endeavours, nowadays.)

“What on earth’s going on?” our reader enquired of her hubby.

“Looks like the zoo animals have escaped their cages in the gym,” he replied, “and now the wild beasts have all gone safari.”

Mind your language

THE joys of educating boys, continued. The advent of Standard Grade meant pupils were allowed to use dictionaries in exams. After sitting his prelim for German, one young scholar bitterly complained to teacher Barrie Crawford that he couldn’t find any of the words he was looking for in his dictionary. On investigation, Barrie discovered that the lad was using a French dictionary.

Bum deal

A FEW years ago reader Lisa Halliday wanted to buy chairs for her dining room which were made from a special type of reinforced glass. Her husband refused, arguing: “They’d just be a pane in the butt.”

Deeply dippy

A DIARY tale about a visit to an optician reminds reader James West of the time he took his 12-year-old son to have his eyes checked. The little fellow was apt to worry about anything in the nature of a medical examination, and had spent the previous evening scouring the internet for ocular problems he feared he might be suffering from. One of the conditions he stumbled upon was glaucoma.

Which led the youngster to whisper to his father, just before his optical test began: “What happens if I have guacamole?”


AS a youngster, reader Ramsey Travers dreamed of being a snooker player. “Unfortunately I never got my big break,” he sighs.

Moreish movie

FILM fan Colin Murphy tells us: “I’m worried that the movie Groundhog Day has become way too influential in my life. I’ve started watching it every day.”

Read more: Do AM radios work at night?