There are few award ceremonies more prestigious than the Grammys. 

Every year, the biggest names in music are rewarded for their endeavours, and this year’s nominations include pretty much every modern superstar you can think of. 

Well, apart from one…

The Grammys? Is that the one where Jarvis Cocker bared his backside in protest at Michael Jackson’s apparent God complex?

No, that’s the Brit Awards. 

Is it the one where Kanye West stormed the stage during Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech to declare “Yo, Taylor, I’mma let you finish, but Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!”. 

No, that’s the MTV Video Music Awards. 

Taylor Swift is among the nominees at this one, though. Kanye, not so much.

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Apparently I don’t know very much about the Grammys.

It’s essentially the music industry equivalent of film’s Oscars and television’s Emmys. The first ceremony was held in 1959, with its title derived from ‘gramophone’. 

What’s a gramophone?

It’s what the people who watch GB News streamed music on when they were children. 

If stages aren’t being invaded like the Brits or VMAs, what’s memorable about the Grammys?

The performances. Specifically, the collaborations. Over the years, artists from various generations have teamed up on the Grammy stage. Memorable alliances have included Elton John & Eminem in 2001, Beyonce & Prince in 2004 and Madonna, Gorillaz & De La Soul in 2006. 

When’s the next ceremony?

February 5th, 2023. 

So why are we talking about it in November 2022?

The nominees were announced on Tuesday.

Who’s up for awards?

Beyonce leads the pack with nine nominations. Rapper Kendrick Lamar, who recently performed at Glasgow’s OVO Hydro, is her nearest competitor with eight.

Britain is well-represented, with Adele earning seven nominations and Harry Styles six. While Adele and Styles are established names at the top of their industry, more notable is Wet Leg’s haul of four nominations.

The Isle of Wight indie band were virtually unheard of 18 months ago, but their meteoric rise has seen them nominated for Best New Artist, Best Alternative Music Performance, Best Alternative Music Album and Best Engineered Album (Non-Classical). 

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You left a name out there…

I did.

Does that mean…

It does.

I’ve got the champagne out. Just say the words…

Ed Sheeran hasn’t been nominated. 

Here we, here we, here we f…

Sorry, there’s a ‘ft. Ed Sheeran’ credit on Bam Bam by Camila Cabello, which is up for Best Pop Duo/Group Performance

But, in a damning indictment of his soulless, focus-grouped, excruciatingly dull music he hasn’t earned a single nomination for his own work?