Boxing clever

MOVING story in The Herald about former Rangers star Willie Henderson planning to trek the Sahara for charity in memory of his daughter. It reminds us of when boxing great Muhammad Ali fought an exhibition bout in Paisley ice rink and was introduced to Willie. After seeing Willie's weather-worn visage, Ali asked him what he did for a living, and when Willie told him, Ali replied: "Football! I'm glad I stuck to boxing."

A real looker

A NEWTON Mearns reader tells us he heard a shopper in the supermarket ask for a specific brand of vinaigrette dressing and being told it was out of stock. The chap then asked the assistant: "Any chance you could give me a note for the wife stating that I had looked everywhere for it and couldn't find it?"

Ready for the weekend

DUNCAN in Selkirk tells us: "I was sitting having a coffee in North Berwick when I overheard a couple discussing holidays. One turned to the other and uttered the deeply meaningful words, 'There's a lot of good weekend breaks going cheap at the moment - unfortunately they're all Friday to Monday'. I couldn't help but agree."

May he?

RECRUITMENT consultancy Robert Half says that almost two in five businesses take just two weeks to discover that they have hired the wrong person, with over a third of business bosses saying the reason is that people were found to be lying on their CVs. A recruiter once told us of an interview where the candidate was asked: "I see from your CV that your interests include politics. Who is the Prime Minister?" After a lengthy pause the graduate replied: "Oh, I said I was interested in politics, but I'm not obsessed by it."

Fly guy

FOREIGN Secretary Boris Johnson has said on a visit to Argentina that it might be an idea for the Foreign Secretary, after Brexit, to have their own airplane in order to sell Britain abroad. Says reader John Henderson: "Got to love the chutzpah of Boris. Now he wants his own jet. Perhaps we can suggest it should be a red one with a message on the side telling everyone how much less a week the NHS won’t be getting to pay for it."

In the driving seat

WE asked for your tales of meeting famous folk, and retired Daily Record journalist Jim Davis recalls that he was once sent to a charity golf event at Renfrew to interview volatile racing driver James Hunt. Says Jim: "The Record had got phone calls from readers complaining about Hunt wearing grubby jeans and T-shirt with one describing him as, 'lookin as if he's jist fell oot a midden. The weans ur getting a right bad example set here, so they urr.'

"Hunt was in the bar beside an immaculate Sean Connery, Henry Cooper and Dickie Henderson. I got out, 'Mr Hunt, our Daily Record readers are complaining that your appearance is downright scruffy. And they say you're setting a bad example to the kids . What's your response?' His memorable reply in a cut-glass accent was, 'You can tell your readers that they are confusing me with someone who actually gives a ****'."


TERRIBLE news about M&S planning to close 100 stores. As a former member of staff bitterly emails us: “Lovingly wrapped. In a creamy white envelope. With gorgeously detailed fine gold writing. And a first-class stamp. This isn’t just any P45. This is an M&S P45.”

No sweat

AN AYSHIRE reader says a member at his golf club declared the other day: "Was at the doc's for a check-up and he asked me how much exercise I was getting. I asked him if sex counted, and he said yes. So I told him, 'None at all'."