Wheely good
GREAT to see the streets of Glasgow, from the west end to Glasgow Green, televised yesterday as part of the women's cycling in the European Championships. As one Glaswegian commented on social media: "This road cycling through the streets of Glasgow on the telly is quality. Inspiring, and it shows the city in a lovely light, showing sights that you wouldn't really see. For example there is a new kebab shop in Sauchiehall Street it seems."
And a vignette of the city from track cyclist and winner of four Olympic gold medals Laura Kenny who commented: "Riding through Glasgow trying to find the apartment we’re staying at, some lady asks me for directions. I reply that I am just as lost as she is and she replies, ‘Ah, OK, you look like you should be in the Olympics or something’."
Getting shirty
MOTHERWELL fans will miss their likeable big defender Cedric Kipre who has been sold to Wigan. We feel the pain of Herald sports writer Graeme McGarry who commented: "Cedric Kipre transfer great business for Motherwell if they can get a replacement in. Hopefully, for the sake of my seven-year old and his brand spanking new kit, he is also called Kipre..."
Fortunately the club came to the rescue of Graeme's pocket and has promised a replacement top for everyone who has bought a new jersey with Cedric's name on the back. Quality club.
Organ recital
A GLASGOW reader phones to tell us his mother has volunteered for the rota to clean her church, including the church organ. She is now going around telling people that she has to "mind my keys and pews."
Cat and mouse
OUR story about politician Mohammad Sarwar reminiscing about the rats he had to remove from his first Glasgow shop reminds retired police officer David Russell in Penicuik: "Back in the seventies, four of us, all trainee cops, rented a Georgian tenement flat in Edinburgh's Newington district, that had a small grocery shop below. We had a problem with mice in our less than pristine kitchen and asked the grocer if we could borrow his kitten to address the issue.
"He readily agreed, but no sooner had he gone when he was back seeking the return of said moggy. He had a mouse problem himself now.
"Shortly afterwards our mice returned, and the cat exchange went on for days. I can't remember how we solved it – possibly just by going to extremes and all getting married."
Senior moment
THE Fringe is now well under way, and stand-up Patrick Monahan at the Gilded Balloon tell us that he previewed his show Goals at a church charity fund-raiser where he was discussing the British class system. Says Patrick: "One of the oldest church-goers in the room, well into his seventies, shouted out, 'I’m middle class, and before I got married I used to go out on a Friday night, drinking and not come home till Sunday, then just have a shower and go to church!' We all laughed, then his wife, also in her seventies, shouted, 'I wish he would still go out on a Friday night and not come back till Sunday. It would be nice to get a couple of days of peace'.”
Labouring the point
THE Herald reported that former Glasgow MP Tom Harris has resigned from the Labour Party. We always thought that might happen after a newspaper reported some time ago that Labour's Shadow Chancellor John McDonnell had said he wouldn't live at No 11 Downing Street, and Tom immediately remarked on social media: "You know something? I don't think it's something he'll have to worry about."
Bird brain
OH dear, thought I was keeping my head down but a colleague marches over and booms: “I’ve got a question for you!” I just stare at him until he adds: “Why do they say ‘as the crow flies’? I saw a couple in the garden and they were flying wildly round in circles.”
Flying Dutchman
NICKNAMES continued. Says Campbeltown reader Mike: "When I was working for the Naafi in Aldershot we had a delivery driver named Peter who was known universally as The Dutchman, which confused me somewhat as Peter was local and certainly not from Holland. I enquired as to why he had that moniker, only to be told it was because he was the 'Naafi Van Driver.'"
Coatbridge is a great wee town, but a reader spots this T-shirt on sale in the town's Main Street and we can't stop ourselves from wondering which of the two items is easier to buy there.
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