HUMANITY, though. We never learn. Carving statues for the past 40,000 years and we still can't get them right.

Did early man look at the Löwenmensch figurine and remark on the waste of decent mammoth tusk? While his peers passed it round with due reverence, did he think 'I hope this doesn't catch on'?

There is little that makes my heart sink more than the news of a new commemorative statue, the potential for disaster runs so high.

South Kesteven district council last month voted to erect a statue of Baroness Thatcher that had previously been rejected by Westminster council. Designed to stand in Parliament Square, it was rejected due to fears it would become a target for protestors.

In rejecting the effigy, Westminster councillors said the administration has a '10-year principle' of waiting a decade after a person's death before erecting a statue, which seems far too liberal. A century would be wiser, and never wiser still.

Having wholeheartedly rejected Maggie's statue, the borough has re-gifted it to the former prime minister's home town of Grantham.

Initially, it was recommended the statue be placed on a plinth three feet high to protect it. Now, though, the 10ft work will sit on a granite block the same height to keep it well out of the way of politically-motivated vandals.

In the interim, the statue is being held in a secret location and I'm quite sure there are many who would like it to remain there, as would I. Not because it's Maggie, but because it's a statue.

The day after the death of George Mendonsa, the US sailor famously photographed kissing a stranger at the end of World War Two, a statue depicting the moment was vandalised with #MeToo graffiti. Is vandalism ever legitimate political protest? Who cares? This is the type of trouble statues cause.

Read more: Plan for Thatcher statue approved

The natives of Dublin have gone absolutely nuts and are erecting not only one but two statues to Luke Kelly, 35 years after the death of the frontman of The Dubliners. I'm sure the social activist son of the city is a fine, decent man without a single metatarsal in his closet, never mind complete skeleton - but what if he's not?

Galashiels weaver Robert Coltart is to have a statue constructed in his home town in the Scottish Borders, a monument in commemoration of the song he penned, Coulter's Candy - better known as Ally Bally Bee.

Isn't this a monument to capitalism? Isn't the song only about selling more of his tooth rotting product?

And let's not overlook another negative element of the statue... its final appearance. Pity poor Victoria Wood, whose statue has been panned for looking more like Tory MP Michael Fabricant. Your life's work immortalised with a statue looking more like the passable likeness of a passport photo than a flattering commemoration.

The sculptor behind a bronze bust of footballer Cristiano Ronaldo had to have a second crack at it, it bore such an appalling resemblance to the man.

In Glasgow, a campaign is underway to build a statue to Benny Lynch, Gorbals boxing sweetheart, one of the best boxers Scotland has ever produced.

Lynch, born in 1913, died at the age of 33 from alcohol-related malnutrition, but prior to that had had an astounding career that included winning the British, European and world flyweight titles.

Lynch was also a convicted child abuser and domestic abuser. He assaulted two young girls of seven and 10 in a Glasgow cinema, and he was convicted of assaulting his wife and his 11-year-old sister-in-law. A charge of trying to gas his baby son over a kitchen stove was found not proven.

As a society, we take the bizarre view that offences of real gravity can be overlooked if the perpetrator has sporting prowess. A talent for sport is repeatedly held up as a mitigating factor when a sportsman has been found guilty of, in particular, domestic violence or sexual assault.

Benny's case is further complicated by his alcoholism. He made real efforts at rehabilitation but these all failed, not least because in the 1930s and 40s we did not have the same understanding of addiction as we do now. And yet, not all alcoholics beat their wives and assault children. The drink is an excuse, not absolution.

There is no nuance to a statue. A statue is unequivocal praise. Here stands Benny Lynch, proudly and with glory, a bold and brave son of Glasgow. Respected, revered. Not everyone will respect and revere him. With a museum exhibition there's the chance to give historical context and a balanced take on the man.

What does one do about a statue? Install a plaque alongside? Doesn't quite cover it, does it?

The Hungarians have a neat solution in Budapest's Memento Park. The open air museum houses monumental statues from Hungary's Communist period. Lenin, Marx, and Engels nestle in safety, remembered but removed.

I don't propose an end to statue commemorations, only an alternative display area. Scotland's Memento Park. There must be an uninhabited island somewhere we can put to good use - good riddance.