Sensitive or savage?

THE Diary is intrigued to learn that the movie star Michael Madsen will be visiting Edinburgh’s Royal Highland Centre in October, as a guest at this year’s Comic Con Scotland.

Madsen has appeared in numerous films, including Quentin Tarantino classics Reservoir Dogs, Kill Bill and The Hateful Eight.

He specialises in playing crazed, violent chaps who like to snarl and rip and crush and gouge. (Not necessarily in that order.)

Less well known is his sensitive side. Madsen’s a published poet.

So does the gentle soul write about daffodils and sunsets? Well, here’s a clue. Poetry books that he’s published have titles such as Beer, Blood and Ashes, Eat the Worm and When Pets Kill.

Hmmm. Perhaps we overstated Madsen’s sensitive side, just a tad.

Final frontier… Glasgow

STROLLING in Glasgow city centre, Diary correspondent Roddy Gardner stumbled upon the part of town where the latest Indiana Jones flick is filming, with street signs modified to make them appear as though they’re part of 1960s America, where some scenes of the movie are set.

Our reader spotted one intriguing sign which stated: "Welcome Apollo 11 Astronauts: Armstrong, Aldrin, Collins."

“I guess this proves what I’ve always believed,” says Roddy. “Glasgow really is full of space cases.”

The name game

WE mentioned that a reader once hired some blokes to work on his house who happened to be called Bob the builder, Eddie the electrician and Paul the plumber. Russell Smith from Largs says: “I would be happy to engage with Bet the Bookie and Thelma the Therapist, but would steer clear of Duff the Doctor.”

Gardener’s question time

AMBLING round his garden with his three-year-old grandson, Malcolm Boyd from Milngavie pointed to some greenery and asked the little fellow if he could see the pretty flowers on the bush.

“Do you mean the bush in front of the agapanthus, Grandpa?” replied the lad, who is clearly shaping up nicely to become a mini Monty Don.

Buying becomes bland

JADED reader Danielle Norris says: “If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.”

Water surprise

A WHILE ago reader Craig Griffin was standing in a pub next to two boozy blokes at the bar. One of the blokes asked the barman for a glass of water.

His chum looked at him disapprovingly.

The first bloke merely shrugged and said: “Sometimes I drink water to give my liver a nice wee surprise.”

Fido v Footie

“WHAT’S the difference between Lassie and football?” asks reader Bob McDowall. “Lassie came home.”

Read more: Was the dark horse a racing certainty?