As amusing as this sketch undoubtedly is, the Diary doesn’t really agree with the conceit of an infinite number of monkeys getting involved in literary matters.

To produce the Herald Diary, we instead trapped an infinite number of koala bears, chained them to rusty typewriters, then ordered them to get cracking, with no slacking.

The koalas have been trained to touch-type and can produce 100 words a minute in shorthand.

Try getting a bunch of dumb monkeys to do that…