INSTEAD of pretending Indyref2 is nigh, SNP deputy leader Keith Brown needs to focus on his paperwork, Unspun feels. “I wonder if you could send me, as a matter of urgency, a copy of my P60, for tax return purposes,” he asked Holyrood officials this week in an email mistakenly sent to the whole parliament. An hour later, the Clackmannanshire MSP sheepishly announced he would “like to recall” his gaffe, to little effect. He used to be the cabinet secretary in charge of Scotland’s economy, you know.
MORE news on Scotland’s naffest political dynasty, the MacGregors of North Lanarkshire. Led by MSP Fulton and brothers Fergus and Findlay, the clan without a plan tried to get a slate of pals elected to key posts at this week’s AGM of the Coatbridge SNP. But the locals formed a solid bloc that defeated them at almost every turn. Worse, the clan’s humiliation took place in front of new SNP chair Kirsten Oswald, who oversaw proceedings. Oops.
- Kevin McKenna: Independence is no longer a nice idea, it's a necessity
MS Oswald also featured in one of several testy exchanges, we hear. When a bloke complained about the non-MacGregor faction being locked out of the branch email account, she exclaimed ‘Don’t talk about that!’ as if it were a state secret. There was also a dark hint that MacGregor-friendly SNP HQ might block the non-MacGregors from running the branch, despite the officer bearers being fairly elected. Ah, the Lanarkshire SNP...
HE may be the 4th baronet of his ilk, but landed millionaire Tory Sir Edward Brian Stanford Mountain can’t hide his proletarian taste buds. A Tory gopher was seen in the Holyrood bar buying a sneaky packet of cheese and onion crisps for the Highlands and Islands MSP, a delicacy his wife won’t let him have at home. Tsk, the shocking double lives of our politicians. Don’t worry, Sir Ed, your secret’s safe with us.
TALKING of grub, it’s time to get shovelling haggis, neeps and tatties to mark Burns night. MSPs are often pressed to speak at suppers, but anyone trying to bag Holyrood orator Adam Tomkins will be disappointed. The Glasgow Tory was overheard saying he’d never been to a Burns supper and had no intention of going. Presumably he’s had enough of wee sleekit, cow’rin, tim’rous beasties in the Conservative party to last a lifetime.
- READ MORE: Brexit may be delayed a few weeks to allow Westminster to process legislation, Andrea Leadsom admits
ONE MSP who can’t resist a Burns supper and a mic is LibDem Alex Cole-Hamilton, who recited his own poem at a bash held by anti-Indy sect Scotland in Union on Thursday. Titled The Mither o’ the Nation, it revels in the civil war afflicting "Queen Nic". Its final verse runs: “We ony luck it’ll end in tears/ With Indy shown the door/ And a union that’s stood 300 years/ Will stand 300 more.” We trust such doggerel/ Proves far more ephemeral.
A FASCINATING leak comes our way - the Labour briefing telling MPs the “top lines” to take last week. The 23-page aide memoire lists Tory sins and Labour virtues on business, Brexit, culture, justice and trade. There are also big chunks on Northern Ireland and Wales. The Scotland section says a lot about the party’s priorities too. It’s completely blank.
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