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Are 'playfairs' the secret to happy marriage? Don't bet on it

There is a phrase the sociologist Catherine Hakim has coined for the kind of sexual affair that makes you happy but doesn't destroy your relationship, and that is "good infidelity".

One of our problems, she claims in her latest book, The New Rules Of Marriage: Internet Dating, Playfairs And Erotic Power, is that we don't practise enough of this, and indeed are all too disapproving of those love rats that do. This, she says, is one of the reasons why we have such high divorce rates both here and in America. We simply haven't cottoned on to the fact that a few fun and clandestine sexual flings – what she calls "playfairs" – are, for both women and men, all it takes to stop a long-term relationship withering of boredom or self-combusting. In other words, when you start to sniff that new scent on your partner's shirt, you should keep quiet and greet it as if it were the wrappings of a Viagra package found in the bottom of the drugs cabinet.

Contextual targeting label: 
Families

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