YES it's party time.
Or as the chap in the Glasgow pub said the other night: "The office Christmas party - a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven't seen for half-an-hour."
A workplace romance?
A GLASGOW woman was telling her friends she went to her office night out, and then spent the night with the same beer-bellied balding guy as the previous year.
"I thought you worked from home?" said a pal.
"Exactly," she replied.
Best Christmas record?
AND a frustrating time of year at the shops as well of course. The Guinness Book of Records has its own Twitter account. Yesterday someone sent to the Guinness people the message: "I've just seen someone completely smash the world record for 'Dithering around in a black Vauxhall Corsa in a Tesco car park.'"
Go in the dark
PILOTS continued. Says George Wishart in Borgue, Dumfries and Galloway: "We had just made an auto landing at Heathrow. The plane rolled to a stop and all that could be seen was a faint glow from a runway light. The pilot made his welcome to Heathrow announcement and added, 'That was the easy part - God knows how I'm going to find the terminal.'"
Board of this behaviour
ANXIOUS times for Rangers fans as the board of directors survive yesterday's annual meeting. We turn to tweeter Oldfirmfacts1 to find out what happened. He states: "Rangers AGM update: 'Sack the board, sack the board, sack the board.' - 'Please, sit down and be quiet Mr McCoist.'"
In the frame
AS ithers see us. International photography website Photophique interviewed snapper Charles Hamilton from Glasgow who talked about taking pictures of members of the public. As Charles explained: "Getting the right expression is important. I was trying to photograph a gentleman on the Gallowgate and he said to me, 'I'll tell you how to get the right expression,' and he shouted, 'hurry up!' I clicked the shutter just at that moment."
Exercise some restraint
MORE on children wise beyond their years. A south side father tells us: "I suggested to my seven-year-old son that we go out to take some exercise. Barely looking up from his Lego, he responded, 'Do we have to Dad? I've got a six-pack already.'"
Romantic? Getaway!
COMEDIANS taking part in a gala night to raise money for the Lord Provost's Clutha Appeal will also be showing their footballing skills with an Old Firm fans v Rest of Scotland on Sunday at noon in the Toryglen Football Centre. Money will be raised by donations at the door and a prize raffle.
We note that raffle prizes include a romantic weekend for two in Paris, and appearing in a Celtic team photo. We just wonder what Celtic fans tell their other half when asked which one they'd rather win.
View to a thrill
WE asked what Scottish TV programmes would be shown if we vote for independence. Tom Bain in Uddingston suggests:
Boggin - the misfortunes of a Danish pastry well past its sell-by date.
Strictly Come Chancin - a fly-on-the-wall documentary based at a Glasgow dancehall.
Have I Got Hughs for You - an occasional series following the ups and downs of famous Hughs (e.g. Fraser, Keevens, McDiarmid).
Dinner for two at Glasgow's Urban Brasserie and Grill for the best.
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