THE full moon in Scotland just now has been captivating.
As Ally Buchanan tells us: "I was walking back from the local pub last night, with the full moon shining hazily through the clouds. One of the lads I was with gazed up and said: 'I wish I could paint that.' The other lad replied, 'You'll need a long brush'."
GROWING old continued. A reader in Jordanhill tells us: "It really is hard to convey to young people the excitement we all genuinely felt at school when the teacher wheeled in an overhead projector to the classroom."
COLLEAGUE Martin Williams poses a question to the Diary: "Why do travel agents never ask if you've got any nice haircuts planned?"
WOMEN being catty? Surely not. Matt Vallance heard two ladies lunching in Kilmarnock discussing a mutual acquaintance who apparently had a guid conceit o' hersel'.
As one of the ladies remarked: "Just who does she think she is? After all, we knew her when she had her original nose."
Taking the plunge
THE football news down south is the imminent transfer of Spurs player Gareth Bale to Real Madrid for truck-loads of money. As one football observer opined: "If I was spending £90m for something that dives, it better be a submarine!"
That takes the biscuit
TECHNOLOGY is always coming up with something new to confuse folk. A woman in a Glasgow office looked up from her computer and asked her colleagues: "Wait, how do I turn on cookies?"
"Try winking and blowing them kisses," her colleague at the next desk suggested.
MSP Bill Walker was found guilty of 23 charges of assault yesterday. The latest story on his website's news page is about funding for a community garden and cookery workshop in Kincardine. "Is that really the latest news going on in the MSP's life?" asks a reader.
WE mentioned Leo Kearse's punning Fringe show Atella the Pun. He tells us: "I got a new laptop. It ate five cream puffs then sang a song about getting dumped. It's a Dell."
Over the score
A READER wonders about the young girl whom he heard in the supermarket gossiping with her girlfriend. Her pal asked her for more details. The girl then replied: "I've already told you more than I actually know."
BRADLEY Manning, who was convicted of leaking secrets and sentenced to 35 years in prison, wants to have hormone therapy and live as a woman named Chelsea. Our American contact tells us: "I think I see what he's doing here. After a while he'll walk up to the gate dressed as a woman, tell the guards he's Chelsea, they'll have no prisoner of that name and let him out. Cunning."
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