PUB conversations continued.

Dougie McNicol was in his local in Bridge of Weir when a friend was talking about an acquaintance who works at Glasgow Airport. "She's got a great job," he said. "She started out as an air hostess and got quite high up."

"Well she would, wouldn't she?" remarked a chap further up the bar.

Horse trap

OUR tale about being spotted on the TV news reminds Ian Arnott in Peterborough: "A senior civil service manager in my department who was on holiday was watching the racing on TV, and as the camera panned over the crowd, who should he see but his assistant - who was supposed to be in the office covering for him in his absence."

Telly vision

TALKING of the TV news, a reader was impressed by the supportive nature of the young man's pal when he overheard a student in Glasgow's west end announce that he wasn't sure whether he should apply for a place on a BBC training scheme. "Go for it," said his pal. "I've seen lots of ugly folk on the telly these days."

School of thought

WISE words heard by a reader in a Clarkston coffee shop where a woman was telling her pal that she was worried that her young son seemed a bit on the short side for his age. "Buy him an expensive new blazer," her pal recommended, presumably from experience, "and watch him shoot up."

In a flap

WE'RE with Janey Godley, the Glasgow stand-up, who told us recently: "I overheard someone on the train announce that her cat flap killed a badger. Now that's a conversation you would want to hear the rest of."

No accounting for taste

A POPULAR Facebook page is "Overheard at Waitrose" where folk put up remarks they have supposedly heard in the posh supermarket such as "Luciano behave! Children these days - I blame the au pairs."

Or "Quentin, find a cake I can pass off as homemade for the village fete".

Now someone has started a Poundland page on Facebook which portrays the remarks of the more down-to-earth shoppers found there. As someone posted: "I've just seen exactly the same thing in the 99p shop, that I'd just bought in Poundland. Gutted!"

Cracking eggs

BEEN watching the exciting end to the football season in England? A fan down south phones to tell us after the weekend games: "Just bought one of those Chelsea Easter eggs, but it crumbled at home."

Poor show

A COLLEAGUE wanders over to discuss previous publications we have worked at. He pipes up: "I was previously editor of Blacked Arteries Monthly." before we could stop him, he triumphantly added: "I lost my job because of dreadful circulation."

Dear oh dear.