Graeme Souness attributes Scottish failure on the football park to poor diet.

Our weans are just not fit enough. He said this after visiting Dunfermline (unathletic) and observing children queuing at pizza, chip and pie shops during their lunch hour. He compared vendors of junk food near schools to drug dealers.

The Tartan Army may now face defeat with the accusatory chant: "Who ate all the pies?" instead of the gently mocking: "We'll support you up to four".

In the olden days pupils had a balanced school dinner with vegetables as well as sponge cake and custard. The boys then played football in the playground and the girls did a bit of skipping.

Nowadays the kids go walkabout to graze on fatty or sugary snacks. There's not a lot to be done about this. Not unless they are made to walk at a brisk aerobic pace and do running on the spot if congregating at street corners. And fast food outlets near schools are only allowed to sell stuff like carrot crudités with hummus or banana and date sandwiches on wholemeal bread.

Pupils cannot be blamed for declining school dinners. Ingredients are purchased with cost not quality in mind. Produce is bought from food conglomerates that may have a complex chain of supply covering many countries. Just like those dodgy supermarket burgers and lasagnes that ended up in the bin.

The lunches are not far removed from the junk category. Mass produced and poorly presented, not on a plate but on a tray that looks like something out of the Shawshank Redemption.

We could put food literally into the hands of our schoolchildren. Let them make lunch. They get one period each morning taking turns at chopping veg, rolling their own fresh pasta, baking their own pies and making perfect healthy chips. Produce is bought fresh and locally. There are dinner ladies in charge and maybe volunteer parents. kids eat off plates and drink fruit juice and water in a civilised setting.

The evangelical process would start with primary classes. Dining in at secondary schools would have to be voluntary to the present generation lost to the prospect of healthy eating. Except for those on a punishment exercise who stay behind to wash the dishes. The rest of the boys and girls are in the playground playing football getting ready for, let's say, World Cup 2026.