What is your idea of earthly paradise?
Being in the Cotswolds where we live, doing a spot of gardening, having a bottle of claret with my wife and not having the stress of rushing off to do a job.
What is your idea of living hell?
Traffic jams - I think of all the pollution and frustration and get so angry that the government is not doing anything about providing a proper transport system.
Under what circumstances do you lie?
I'm very open and my wife says sometimes I'm too open. I'm generally very candid in all my relationships but I would never be candid to the point of upsetting someone.
What is your most endearing feature?
An impossible question to answer because whatever I say will sound like conceit or vanity. You'd have to ask other people.
What is your most annoying habit?
I'm meticulous when I'm doing a job and most people appreciate that, but there are others who are irritated by it. What irritates one might be admired by another.
Which historical figure do you most admire?
It's only by knowing history that you can plan ahead and evolve so I greatly admire people who have a sense of history and destiny such as Winston Churchill, who foresaw what was going to happen in Germany long before anybody else.
Which living person do you most identify with?
I'm not a person who identifies with other people. I try to be my own person and do my own thing.
What have you loved and lost?
I have loved some beautiful
people and lost but you always
learn something from your disappointments. As a young man, I loved and lost and loved and won. Who or what is the love of your life?
My family. My wife Annie and children and grandchildren are all important to me. The love of my wife is essential to my well-being.
Where would you most like to call home?
I love calling the Cotswolds home, but I also love Scotland and have the happiest memories of working in the Glasgow shipyards. I always call it my adopted home as the most important years - my teenage years - were spent there. All the wonderful characters in Clydebank taught me about life. By surviving in that tough environment, I learned a lot about myself.
Who are your favourite writers?
I suffer from dyslexia, so I read very slowly and don't read a great amount which is one of the drawbacks of my life. Tom Sharpe is funny and I also admire Stephen Fry. I read a lot of autobiographies - I've just finished reading the autobiography of my good friend Jimmy Logan. I like Ernest Hemingway for a good adventure, Patricia Highsmith for a good detective story. I often read Burns poems.
What CDs are you listening to?
I don't listen to a lot of music because I love the spoken word, but what I do enjoy most is jazz.
What makes you most happy?
The love of my wife and family and broader friends. If you have the love of the important people, then you can go out and achieve far more.
What makes you most unhappy?
Cruelty of any kind distresses me, particularly to children. How anybody can harm the most naturally loving things in the world is beyond me.
If you could have dinner with anyone who would it be?
Ella Fitzgerald, as long as she could get up and give us a song and Winston Churchill, as long as he gave a speech afterwards because he'd find the right words to use. He was a natural orator.
What can't you do without?
Love. A world where you haven't got the love of your family and friends would be a horrible place.
Who can't you live without?
My wife Annie, my children and grandchildren.
What are your favourite names?
Suzy, the name of my daughter, which looks nice and has a ring to it. Not Susan, which is a horrible name. Nicholas was so unusual when I was at school that I didn't tell other children what my name was, so they nicknamed me Jimmy.
What is the most stupid thing you have done?
There are things that you regret all the time. If you haven't got any regrets in life, then you must be a pretty strange individual.
What is the most admirable thing you have done?
It's difficult to answer that question without appearing narcissistic. I was flattered when I was elected rector of St Andrews University. The students thought I could do a good job and I hope I did.
Nicholas Parsons will be appearing in Happy Hour at Pleasance Over the Road, Edinburgh until August 27.
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