ALL the talk among Glasgow politicians is whether there is a "Games legacy" after the Commonwealth Games.
Writer Deedee Cuddihy tells us: "Some male neighbours have created, with a table and chairs, a little area in the tenement backcourt to sit out and enjoy a few drinks and a smoke. Just the other day, however, I looked out and saw that one of the chairs had been replaced by an exercise bike and that one of the regulars was using it - while still drinking and smoking. Surely a Games legacy we can be proud of?"
JIM Campbell, doing stand-up at Underbelly at the Edinburgh Fringe, was asked to give advice about sharing accommodation with other performers in Edinburgh. He suggested: "Do have a party on your last night. You've made it through alive, made new friends and grown as a person, so why not? Life is for living and you've earned it."
He then added: "Don't have a party on your last night. There's so much to clean, you haven't packed and you have to be at Waverley Station in 20 minutes because you booked an appallingly early train to save money. Something has got to give. It will be your deposit."
So glad he cleared that up then.
Kings of cool
AND Katherine Ryan, who has finished her Fringe shows at the Stand, was musing on the current popularity of the younger members of the Royal Family. "They are so cool," she opined. "Like supply teachers who let you call them by their first names."
SO Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott has come out against Scottish independence. Back home in Oz he has a reputation for saying the wrong thing. "No one," said Tony to much derision, "however smart, however well-educated, however experienced … is the suppository of all wisdom."
He also faced criticism from the Irish embassy in Australia when he described the previous Australian Government as being "a bit like the Irishman who lost £10 betting on the Grand National and then lost £20 on the action replay."
Stars fail to shine
AFTER being less than impressed by the line-up for television's Celebrity Big Brother, a reader tells us: "I have the answer to the age-old question, 'What's the difference between Big Brother and Celebrity Big Brother?'
"The answer being, 'nothing'."
It's all about timing
ALISON Campbell was at the National Gallery of Modern Art where the latest exhibition includes Douglas Gordon's celebrated film 24 Hour Psycho. She heard a group by-pass it with the comment: "No that. We'd be there all day."
I do remember now
A HYNDLAND reader tells us he knows he really shouldn't have, but he couldn't resist it when his wife asked: "What's that thing called where you walk into a room and you wonder what the hell you went in there for?" and he replied: "A wedding?"
SO a colleague wanders over to tell us: "I've just found out my mate is the front end of Black Beauty in a new stage production of the book."
He then added: "He's a bit of a dark horse."