It’s been a good week for ... birthday presents

Is there no end to David Beckham’s talents? The 42-year-old footballer spent six days putting together an elaborate Disney castle for daughter Harper. He even found the time to Instagram a picture of himself with the finished article, a 4,080-piece 3D Lego affair. A fitting gift for a wee girl who celebrated her sixth birthday with a party at Buckingham Palace.

Hats off, though. Kids’ toys can be a minefield. I shudder to recall the purchase of a child's chute, whose instructions said it would take one person 15 minutes to construct.

Top tip: do not leave the assembly of such items to the night before the birthday. The instructions should have read: takes two people, two hours, half a bottle of wine and a Chinese takeaway.

And there was still a screw left over at the end. Flatpack slides? A slippery slope.

It’s been a bad week for ... chocolate-lovers

The Walnut Whip is being denuded of its crowning glory.

The chocolate treat – started in 1910 by Duncan's of Edinburgh – is losing its walnut.

Nestle, which now makes the famous snack, is launching three new varieties of the Walnut Whip, sans nut. The new Whips (without the Walnut prefix) will not replace the classic walnut-topped version, though.

"Walnut Whip remains on sale alongside our new vanilla, caramel and mint versions," said a Nestle spokeswoman, explaining that the new flavours reflected the company's desire "to extend the Whip range".

Or is it just more “shrinkflation”? We’ve only just recovered from news that Tobelerones now have bigger troughs than peaks in order to keep the price down, and a packet of Maltesers has diminished from 121g to 103g.

Of course, we can always blame Brexit. The fall in the value of sterling, rising transport costs, and poor crops in some walnut-growing regions have pushed up the price of the nuts in Britain by about 20 per cent.

What next? Will they remove the whip?

More worrying are the detrimental health implications of removing the nut, the one bit of a Walnut Whip that can salve the consumer’s conscience and a fine source of protein and fibre.

Without that, what are we left with?

All choc and no substance, I fear.