YOU can't beat the generosity of Glaswegians. A worker at Glasgow's great Prince and Princess of Wales Hospice tells us: "A kind soul recently donated a toastie maker, still in the box, to one of our shops in Glasgow. It was only when the box was opened that the shop assistant realised an old toastie maker had been donated in the box of a new one. And inside the toastie maker? A very old and very mouldy cheese toastie.
"Someone out there has been waiting a long time for their savoury snack."
HARD to believe there was some opposition to the Scottish Government's scheme to give a baby box full of essentials to new babies which could also be used as a cot. As Bruce Skivington comments: "It is an excellent idea, the Government giving every baby a cardboard box to sleep in.
"If Brexit goes ahead we shall all be sleeping in cardboard boxes."
WELL that's the New Year well and truly over. A final piece of whimsy from John Park who says: "My New year's resolution is to stop using aerosol deodorants. Roll on 2017."
And a reader muses: "It might be a commentary on my life style, but should I be worried that the first two texts I received at the New Year were from the local pizza delivery service and my favourite curry house?"
AND hangover cures were being discussed in a Glasgow pub at the weekend when one chap told his pals: "Nothing cures a hangover like your girlfriend saying her pregnancy test was positive."
WE mentioned new football chants, and Jim McEleny tells us: "I liked the Morton fans at their recent derby with St Mirren singing. 'We wish you a relegation, and two trips to Stranraer' to the tune of 'We wish you a Merry Christmas'."
TOUGH being a parent. A Patrick reader was in his local supermarket where he heard a mother shout at her child: "No!" The young lad looked at her and said in a hurt tone: "But I didn't ask for anything."
"You looked as if you were about to," she replied.
NOT been in the taxi queue late at night at Central Station for a while, which is a shame as you meet all human life there. A Pollokshields reader who was there at the weekend heard the perfect, barbed, apology, when the young woman in front of him told her pal: "I'm sorry if you were offended when I called you an idiot.
"I honestly thought you already knew."
WE'VE had a few odd number plates features recently, and Margery Dobson wonders: "I spotted an intriguing number plate recently - WH05 DAB - and wondered if it belonged to a fingerprint expert, or an argumentative fisherman."
I SWEAR a colleague, clearly a fan of the Jacksons, was lurking at my desk yesterday in the hope I would turn up as he immediately buttonholed me with: "I had a bet on three horses at the weekend. Sunshine, Moonlight, and Good Times. Not one winner. I blame it on the bookie," before walking off.
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