Moving story
OUR story about furniture left out for the binmen reminds David Miller in Milngavie: “Comedian Lex McLean told the story of how he was called into the burroo to explain why he had been seen selling firewood in Dumbarton Road. ‘Selling firewood?’ he exclaimed. ‘I was flitting!’”
Bowled over
THE bowlers are really making the most of the good weather just now. A Newton Mearns reader tells us he bumped into the wife of a pal who had taken up the bowls and he asked if she had followed suit.
“Don’t be daft,” she replied. “I’m not old enough, I don’t have a large rear, and I can’t abide crimplene trousers.”
Harsh!
Bedtime story
STILL much discussion on Theresa May ducking out of a live debate with Jeremy Corbyn and other party leaders. As Steve Bugeja put it: “Theresa May’s approach to this election reminds me a lot of the time I went to bed at my own house party.”
Right up his street
CORONATION Street regular Roy Barraclough who played shifty landlord Alec Gilroy has sadly died. We remember our journalist chum Tam Cowan once asking who was the most mentioned character on Corrie who never actually appeared in person.
We were stumped until Tam told us: “Willie Ekkerslike”.
That’s a wrap
WE asked what you did at school, but never since, and George Crawford reminds us: “Re-folding Spangles and Opal Fruits wrappers to trick people into thinking that they still contained sweets.”
That’s a belter
WE ended our school toilet stories but Grant Young manages to combine school toilets with our other thread, getting the belt, by telling us: “When I attended Ayr Academy, the toilets were a haunt of smokers, and offered a fair chance of escape from PE Principal Jock McLure’s occasional raids, as when he charged in one end, the smokers would disappear out the opposite end.
“One day, I was, as a committed non- smoker, standing doing what the toilets were designed for doing when the smokers scarpered when Jock stormed in. I was ordered to his office where I duly received six of the best from his Lochgelly. He said that as the only person there I must have warned the smokers.”
Bit of a wash-out
AH the philosophers of Glasgow pubs. A reader heard a toper opine the other night in his local: “Some people say marriage is like taking a bath - not so hot once you’ve been in it for a while”.
Muscling in
THE health and keep-fit website Men’s Fitness has named Glasgow as one of the top ten hottest international travel destinations this summer. We just hope that all the Glasgow lads with their taps aff in the summer doesn’t put the fitness fanatics to shame when they arrive.
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