TV funnyman Al Murray's "pub landlord" is to stand in the general election - on a manifesto that includes a pledge to make Alex Salmond the First Minister of Norwich.
The position would help the former SNP leader understand what being ignored by the rest of the UK "is really like", Mr Murray said.
"The pub landlord", known for his praise for all things British, will stand in Thanet South for the newly-formed Free United Kingdom Party, in a bid to prevent Ukip leader Nigel Farage becoming an MP.
Mr Murray outlined his plans telling voters: "Other parties offer the moon on a stick. We'll do better than that: a British moon on a British stick."
Other policies include to take the UK out of Europe by 2025 and out of the Solar System by 2050, deal with immigration by bricking up the Channel Tunnel, bring back National Service "but only for people who don't want to do it", lock up the unemployed to cut crime, and restore the original Creme Egg recipe.
On Scotland, he said: "Alex Salmond will be made First Minister for Norwich, so he can get to understand what being ignored by the rest of the country is really like."
Mr Farage already faces a tough contest in Kent where the Tories are keen to retake the seat from Labour.
Explaining his decision to stand, the pub landlord said: "It seems to me that the UK is ready for a bloke waving a pint around, offering common sense solutions."
Mr Farage is often pictured at photocalls in a pub with a drink in his hand.
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