Strong words
A HANDPICKED crowd of Scotland’s great and moneyed packed out the top of Edinburgh’s New Club last week at the invitation of financial adviser Alan Steel.
Star of the alternative Fringe was Jim Mellon, Scottish fund manager turned master investor worth £850 million, and with a reputation to rival Warren Buffett.
His strongest indignation was reserved for fund managers who have been buying government bonds at tiny or negative yields. He said: “This is completely and utterly crazy... those idiots managing pension funds and insurance companies who have done those trades are going to look fools – which is what they are, and they should lose their jobs.”
The temptation of drink
IF the pay on offer is not a sufficient entitlement, Diageo offers another incentive for would be directors and non-executive directors of its board.
The latest annual report from the Scotch whisky giant confirms all directors of the FTSE-100 company are entitled to a product allowance.
With a catalogue spanning Smirnoff, Guinness, Johnnie Walker, Baileys, Bell’s and countless other brands, s almost as if the terms and conditions had been written by Carlsberg.
Economic clar-ity
WE were amused on the business desk to be offered a free interview with Julian Clary.
The comic is doing the rounds talking about his first ever children’s book, as well as sharing the joys of working in panto.
We can’t help but think the chance to have heard his take on UK economic policy is an opportunity missed.
Appetite for gags
SOMETIMES a pun is just too hard to resist.
PR firm Liquorice Media trailed its news that French Duncan is to sponsor food and drink festival Let’s Eat Glasgow! by highlighting the firm’s “insatiable appetite for innovation”.
The event will see leading chefs and producers join forces to host a restaurant festival and pop-up market in Glasgow’s Finnieston area – home to French Duncan – on September 5 and 6.
It certainly gives us, er, food for thought.
Black humour
THERE is humour in even the most worrying world economics news.
As global stock markets plunged this week over China’s economic slowdown, Iain Duff tweeted: “This is rubbish. Can’t find any bargains on Amazon at all #BlackMonday.”
Storm in a teacup
HOW does a billionaire make his investment decisions?
Jim Mellon had a surprising answer in Edinburgh, citing “anecdotal evidence”.
His own came from a trip to Klosters in Switzerland (“the most boring place on the planet”) where he ordered tea and was presented with hot water and a tea bag.
When he complained it was too weak, the waiter brought another tea-bag. “He charged me another seven Swiss francs for another cup of tea, I thought ‘I hate Switzerland’ I am going to sell it.”
Mr Mellon’s Swiss investments were sold down, just in time to avoid the currency devaluation.
Mr Mellon’s Swiss investments were sold down, just in time to avoid the currency devaluation.
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