WE CAN look forward to some over-the-ball tackles and general dirty
play in Scottish TV's new quiz show, A Game of Two Halves, which begins
a week on Thursday.
The approach and format is not entirely dissimilar to BBC2's popular
and slightly risque Have I Got News For You. The two team captains are
Tony Roper and Denis Law, with Scotsport presenter Jim White in the
middle.
A typical exchange is when Roper throws in, a propos of not a lot,
that former Morton and Celtic favourite Andy Ritchie was known to his
team-mates by the nickname M'bosa. The logic behind the choice of
cognomen escapes Law for almost the entire programme, showing either
he's not as quick as he used to be on the park, or that he had a very
sheltered upbringing.
Andy Goram, appearing as a guest, has to suffer a reference to why he
earned the nickname Silkie. The panelists are shown four photographs --
a Hibs jersey, a Rangers jersey, a Hearts jersey, and a pair of women's
knickers -- and asked to pick the odd one out. The answer, of course, is
that Andy has never worn a Hearts jersey.
White, I am told, emerges from the series as a man with a sense of
honour. Although it could be said that he has taken pastiche to the
point of parody (or vice-versa) and has assumed the persona created for
him by the Only an Excuse sports comedy programme.
A scene is re-enacted from White's own appearance in the tabloid press
when he is presented on air with an orange flute band uniform jacket.
A surprise star performer in the series is Danny McGrain. While the
Celt is fondly remembered as a world-class full back, he could never
have been described as a great communicator, especially with his false
teeth out.
Who knows, we might even get to see the funny side of Jim Farry.
* A BRAVERY Award to junior footballer, Eddie Allan. He was playing
for Largs Thistle against Kilwinning Rangers in the final of the
Ardrossan and Saltcoats Herald Cup at Meadow Park, Irvine.
Allan was dismissed from the field for an over-enthusiastic challenge.
As he left the pitch he blessed himself, in full view of the enraged
Kilwinning fans, not once, not twice, but thrice.
Amazingly, he made it to the safety of the dressing-room.
* THIS month's issue of Golf Magazine carries an obituary of Harvey
Penick, the golfing sage and guru to such as Ben Crenshaw and Tom Kite.
Born in 1904, Penick was pro for 48 years at Austin, Texas, and for 60
years kept a little red notebook in which he scribbled his thoughts on
golf and life in general. These were published when he was 88 years old
in Harvey Penick's Little Red Book.
Harvey has gone to the great clubhouse in the sky but his name lives
on with his own design of clubs. The issue of Golf Magazine which
carries his obituary also has an advert for the Harvey Penick clubs --
with the slogan ''Take Dead Aim.''
* TOMMY Docherty features prominently, as you might expect, in a new
book, a collection of Quotable Scots. He said of George Best, in an
after-dinner speech: ''George can't be here tonight. He was launching a
ship in Belfast and wouldn't let go of the bottle.'' And on his sad
departure from Manchester United: ''They sacked me as nicely as they
could. One of the nicest sackings I've had.''
* A RESULT from the Inverness amateur football league, as printed in
the Inverness Courier -- DM Hall 0, Dynamo Smithton 11,117. A misprint,
unfortunately. They lost only 7-0.
The DM Hall goalkeeper, incidentally, was one Iain MacDonald,
presenter of Radio Scotland's Summer Sportscene programme and a chap who
is obviously better talking about sport than doing it.
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