Mary Cozzi lives in hope of seeing the grandson she has never met. The chance to finally lay to rest the ghosts which have stalked her since her 24-year-old son's tragic early death in 1997. It is a journey which has offered nothing but torment and heartbreak.
But she has vowed never to give up searching for the boy - believed to be aged 10 or 11 - so that she can pass on a #20,000 inheritance to her son's secret love child.
''This is not something any mother can walk away from,'' Mary says quietly. ''I need to find this young boy. He's my son's flesh and blood.''
The moving story started in 1994 when good-looking young Dino Cozzi - a scaffolder to trade from Leith, Edinburgh - won #100,000 compensation after breaking his back in a fall
at work.
Previously, the outgoing young man had his whole life in front of him.
But it all went badly wrong when Dino - enduring almost constant pain from a crippling back injury - used his cash windfall to fuel a mad spree of drinks and parties.
Mother Mary claims he blew nearly #80,000 on his friends, luxury foreign holidays, and all-night drinking sessions in just three years.
And his chaotic lifestyle and addiction to drink sparked the illness that eventually cost young Dino his life in August 1997.
But amid rumours from Dino's close friends that he had fathered a child without confiding in her, Mary Cozzi embarked on a search for the young boy - her grandson. All she has been told is that the little boy was called Lee and would now be around 10 or 11 years old.
Mary, who has another son and a daughter, explains: ''It all started when I heard from friends of Dino that he had a son. You can imagine how I felt after hearing such news. After much badgering of his friends, I found out that the boy was called Lee and the mother was from Leith, where he stayed.
''It's not something I would wish on any parent, but it's something I have to do. He got #100,000 compensation but there is only around #20,000 left after he spent so much in parties and drinks. The money left over, when I find the boy, will be handed over to him. It's his inheritance, after all.''
Divorcee Mary has placed adverts appealing for the boy to get in touch and has even hired a private detective to track him down.
''All my efforts have come to nothing so far,'' Mary says, her voice noticeably shakier. ''This is eating me up. I want my grandson Lee to get this money. But I also want to know that he's being properly looked after.
''All I want is to see him and to know he is in good hands. The thought that he's out there, possibly still in Edinburgh with his mother, and I can't see them is tearing me apart. There's a sadness which is lingering with me because of that and it has been hard to shrug off. I try to be optimistic but it's not easy.''
Mary, currently working in a bingo hall near Leith, says Dino turned to booze after his accident and his life became a deranged merry-go-round of parties.
Occasionally he would blow #5000 at a time on alcohol binges with friends and family across Edinburgh's pubs and clubs.
But despite pleading with Dino's many friends for help, none has yet revealed the whereabouts of her grandson or the mother.
''Dino was so popular and loved football, especially Hibs,'' she says, her voice breaking with emotion. ''He was such an energetic boy who had his whole life in front of him until the accident. But from there it was all downhill. I couldn't do anything. I was helpless.''
Dino was so popular that a distraught close friend astonished 10,000 football fans at a Scottish Premier League match between Hibs and Kilmarnock in August 1997 - only days after Dino's funeral - by laying flowers on the pitch in memory of his dead pal. Patrice Jumelle dashed on to the pitch and placed a bunch of flowers in the centre circle - and then blessed himself.
''Dino had a lot of friends who all loved football,'' Mary says. ''He was just one of many. Dino was a lovely lad and a devoted son. I loved him so much.'' But the flickering hope of finding her grandson has not faded despite her best efforts.
She adds: ''I've tried to publicise this but without success, I've even started using mediums, you know, spiritualists, to try and find some comfort. Some people might find that strange, but I think when you are facing up to not being able to meet your grandson, you take comfort in different ways.'' Mary has also taken comfort from bereavement counsellers in Edinburgh, who are trying to help her get over her loss and sadness at not being able to track down young Lee.
But Mary finds that certain times of the year hit harder than most.
''At Christmas it is terrible because I'm thinking: What if my grandson is not well and being looked after? It's so sad. I need to see
my grandson.''
Mary's heartbreaking search may not have found the boy. But, if she is lucky, Mary's solicitors will demand tests to prove that the child is Dino's.
''The onus will be on those coming forward to, in some way, prove that it is Dino's child, for example, photographs,'' Mary says. ''Failing that, medical tests
may have to be carried out to prove that
the claims are authentic. In many ways it might just be a straightforward case of
the mother coming forward, or one of
Dino's friends finally pointing me in the right direction.''
Mary's search may have borne no fruit so far, but she vows never to give up. ''How can I?'' she said. ''Dino was precious and I want to meet Lee and see how he is. I want this all
to finish.''
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