STEPHEN DAISLEY
In the wake of the Iraq war, novelist Margaret Drabble voiced what has become a common cry among the chattering classes. "My anti-Americanism has become almost uncontrollable," she wrote. "It has possessed me, like a disease. It rises up in my throat like acid reflux, that fashionable American sickness. I now loathe the United States."
To be fair, she did mourn for "another America", but her rant missed an important point. Contemporary US culture, whether literature, film or art, has simply become better than its British counterpart. And those dedicated haters of all that is American are mainly driven by an inferiority complex. "Look," they whine to themselves, "it's so big and shiny, and I'm so itsy and pathetic. I hate it so much!"
American culture is the realm of opportunity. Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. British culture is inadequate, mediocre and wedded to the class system.
The BBC lets rip with a deluge of prejudicial caricatures in its TV comedy line-up. Vicki Pollard is cited by supercilious snoots as evidence that working-class young women are feckless, lazy, stupid, greedy, self-obsessed and willing to sell their baby for a Westlife album. Catherine Tate's verbal mugger Lauren, the teenager who ain't bovvered, is one of the most egregious instances of social bigotry in Britain today. How frightful those council estate people are! Tut tut. Pass the Radio Times, Hermione.
What infuriates the anti-Americans is that this kind of class prejudice is nowhere to be seen in the country that gave us Roseanne, The Beverly Hillbillies and King of Queens. The real reason middle-class Brits object to Jerry Springer is because it allows poor people on TV. We can only copy. And that's before we get to the acme of American culture: Homer Simpson. Fat, belligerent and dumb, but kind, loving and deep-down a decent guy, Homer is allowed to be himself - Joe Average America.
The popular and critical embrace of imported US TV in Britain is testament to the superior production values of American output. HBO is the epitome of televisual quality, responsible for The Sopranos, Deadwood and Sex in the City.
American letters are thriving, while British literature withers on the vine of torpor, unoriginality and critical myopia otherwise known as Newsnight Review. James Ellroy is one of the finest crime writers in the world. Tom Wolfe continues to be as sharp as electric Kool-Aid. Hell, even old Norman Mailer is still banging them out. America gets Toni Morrison. We get Ian McEwan. If broody meditations on masculinity under conflict are your thing, fine, but let's not pretend he's anything grander than Tony Parsons for Guardian readers.
Hollywood has the glitz and glamour, while the burgeoning indie scene has the complex emotions and quirky characters. US film-makers produce thousands of movies a year, packing cinemas across the world, especially in Britain where audiences will do anything to avoid kitchen-sink monotony.
Why is American culture superior? Well, contrary to the old dictum, money is the root of all good. US culture is attuned to the bang of the buck. Giving people what they want, what entertains them, also happens to produce the best cultural products. So, if you are an imbiber of culture, rather than a guzzler of swill, switch your remote Stateside. All aboard the cultural Mayflower: we're off to the promised land!
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