The United Nations Board of Significant Inspiration (UNBOSI) researchers have issued a statement saying that Scotland is experiencing unprecedented levels of imagination, creativity and genius tendencies, linked to the discovery of huge deposits of MUSE across
the country.

Micro-molecular unseen sensory emanations, or MUSE, is a colourless, odourless substance that seeps into the atmosphere from underground fissures. It has been the subject of study by UNBOSI scientists since the 1950’s, and has been proven to be linked to heightened levels of inspiration in humans who come into contact with it. MUSE hotspots have been documented around the world alongside great acts of human tenacity and ingenuity, and UNBOSI has confirmed the discovery of two new MUSE sites; centralised in Glasgow and Dundee.

“It’s an extraordinary occurrence”, says Director General of UNBOSI Roger Hartley. “To make a discovery of MUSE fissures of this size is almost as incredible as the effect we can see it is having on the Scottish population.” Preliminary studies held with participants from the surrounding areas have revealed that inspiration is up 66.6%, and the UK Intellectual Property Office has had a spike in patent applications from inventors in the MUSE emanation zones.

Now, UNBOSI has announced plans for properly storing and sharing MUSE so that it can be disseminated and applied more widely. To do this, they’ve brought in a team of marbleologists; specially trained researchers and scientists who have developed the process for ‘trapping’ MUSE, using marbles.

“Evidence of MUSE has been detected throughout human history, stretching all the way back to 2000 BCE having been discovered in the ancient city of Mohenjo-Daro, Ancient Egypt, as well as in Ancient Rome and in pre-hispanic Mexico in the first century AD. Alongside each of these ancient discoveries there are always marbles”, says Professor
Shannon Igans, a senior marbleologist at UNBOSI. “They act as a sort of talisman, but the science goes deeper than that. We’ve been working for decades on the MUSE storing properties of marbles, and we now have a way to infuse MUSE into them so that the marbles can be dispersed to people who need inspiration, but aren’t lucky enough to be
exposed directly to MUSE.”

The Herald:

Igans adds, “We need to work quickly with these natural fissures to capture the MUSE; process it, and get marbles out to the people who need them. We’ve deployed our team, but with a MUSE cache of this size it’s important to have as many people aiding with the work as possible, which is why we’ve begun to recruit and train local marbleologists”.
In the last week several shipments of scientific equipment have been brought into Scotland, including specialist apparatus for measuring ERT levels (the amount of inspiration in the atmosphere), and equipment for setting up mobile research and training facilities in marbleology.

The Herald:

Free community workshops are being held until the end of July across Dundee and Glasgow, which are open to people of all ages and abilities who are interested in helping UNBOSI spread inspiration through marbles. “Anyone of any age can learn the basics of marbleology, and how to harvest and transmit inspiration” says Hartley. “We need help
from as many people as we can with our mission to help stop conservative, uninspired, negative thinking and make sure everyone has got their marbles”.

For more information or to join in the marbleology workshops, visit