IT'S the 125th anniversary of that great iconic Scottish structure, the Forth Rail Bridge. We remember a tourist heaping great praise on the bridge at one of those holiday trip websites, and urging folk to take a train across it. Wanting to be helpful he added: "Just to be clear though, the railway line goes straight across - you don't go up and down the giant triangles, which is a pity."
ODD overheard conversations. Says Eleanor Young in Stirling: "I overheard in a hospital waiting room a woman who told her pal, 'I haven't heard from her since she moved last year. I don't even know her new address. I think of her a lot, and worry that she might be deid.' Her friend answered, 'I wouldn't worry. She must be all right or she would have phoned you'."
WATCHING telly with an older generation continued. Says reader Jim Scott: "My auntie Sadie asked me once if I watched the very good American police series 'Nipped Blue'. I said I never heard of it, and she showed me in the paper, 'Nine o'clock, Channel 4, NYPD Blue'."
WE mentioned Mother's Day cards, and Phyllis Strachan in Milton of Campsie passes on: "I'm glad that cards are available to send to adoptive/foster mothers for Mother's Day, but many years ago the little daughter of a friend of mine sent her mother (her biological mother) a card which read, 'You have been like a Mother to me'.
Genuine sentiments there I believe."
THE news that the National Theatre of Scotland's production of Macbeth is to tour Japan reminds us of actor Gyles Brandreth once commenting: "Was it at Macbeth in Sloane Square that an audience member was overheard saying, 'You know, exactly the same thing happened to Marjorie?'"
NEWSfrom Ayrshire where the Ship Inn in Irvine now serves chips. Not unusual in Scotland you might think, but the Ship Inn was once owned by the late Ian Murray, a great chap, who had a sign outside proclaiming: ''No Chips. No Children's Menu. No Credit Cards. A Warm Welcome Awaits.'' He took the sign down when he decided that the modern commerce of credit cards would be allowed - but there were still no chips. At the time Ian told us he was taken aback when a chap came in and asked: ''Do you sell empire biscuits?'' When asked why he wanted an empire biscuit, the chap said: ''My son likes them,'' and after being told there were no empire biscuits, he settled for cheese and onion crisps before wandering out again. ''That's it,'' said Ian. ''I'm putting the sign back out with 'No Empire Biscuits' painted over the credit card line.''
WHO knew there would be so many stories about artist Jack Vettriano's book signings? Now Frank Pignatelli tells us: "When Jack Vettriano was doing a book signing at the Glasgow Art Galleries last year, I asked him to dedicate a copy to my daughter Angela. Jack duly signed it 'To Angla from Jack Vettriano'.
"When I pointed out that he had missed out an 'e' in Angela, he apologised, and altered it to 'To Anglea'. His distraction may not have been unrelated to the fact that he indicated that he was really desperate for a cigarette break."
ERIC Smith was travelling to Glasgow Airport where he picked up a leaflet advertising an airport lounge there which stated: "Rest and relax before your flight with free drinks and snacks from just £12.50 per person." He feels that is quite an elastic definition of free.
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