THEY’LL never compete with Jagger and Richards, but Holyrood’s own ‘Nic and Keef’ can still put on an entertaining show. All they have to do is disagree with each other.

Luckily, Ms Sturgeon and her SNP deputy are naturals.

Last week, Keith Brown announced there would be a new Scottish currency after independence, provoking scepticism, criticism but precious little enthusiasm from his own side. His opponents were almost as upset.

This week, it emerged he had been telling randoms in Aberdeen that if the SNP wanted to have a second independence referendum, it could damn well have one, whatever the UK Government and the legal nerds said.

This is not SNP policy. In fact, it’s the opposite of the tune Nic has been singing.

At FMQs, Tory Jackson Carlaw was quick to exploit the band’s creative differences.

“Another independence referendum is the last thing Scotland needs. Irrespective of the views of her errant deputy, will the First Minister rule out that divisive plan?”

At that word “errant,” Keef’s other half, equalities minister Christina McKelvie, started rocking alarmingly with laughter. Errant? As if!

But Nic was unamused. “The legal basis for the next independence referendum should be the same as the basis for the last independence referendum,” she said, making it clear there would be no wildcat vote, whatever her dopey deputy was putting about up north.

Ms McKelvie’s laughter suddenly dried to a croak.

Ms Sturgeon then focused on her other irritant. All this Indyref2 talk was caused by anti-democratic Tories denying the people a say, she went on.

“We can always tell when the Tories are in trouble, because pantomime Jackson Carlaw makes a reappearance.

“The face gets red and the arms get waved about.”

Mr Carlaw, whose Dr Octopus limbs and beetroot puss are indeed natural wonders, looked wounded.

The FM had managed to get under his cochineal skin.

“The whole chamber knows that in two short years Ruth Davidson will be sitting where the First Minister sits today,” he thundered, “and a Scottish Conservative First Minister will be answering questions for a long time to come!”

The ensuing laughter from the rest of the chamber seemed to go on longer than Exile on Main Street.

Nic and Keef, you’re a hit.