Busy boys

THE curious things people say… A reader was in the Marks & Spencer cafe in Argyle Street when she overheard the following snippet of conversation between two women, discussing a mutual pal: "She's not been great, but her two sons can't help because one's got Covid and the other one has sheep and llamas."

Rocking?

WE recently mentioned that the inhospitable Scottish granite islet Rockall was once memorably described as being, “desolate, despairing and awful.”

Reader Lisa Bentley says: “What a coincidence. That also rather aptly describes the present situation of a certain resident of Number 10 Downing Street.”

Musical mystery

IN a nostalgic frame of mind, the daughter of reader Gordon McRae was recalling her youth, when she sometimes received a flexi disc along with a magazine. Older readers may recall this was a very thin slither of vinyl, with grooves impressed into the surface, which played pop music on a standard record player.

Gordon’s daughter recalled the major drawback with the flexi disc. It needed “two peas” to weigh it down in order for it to play.

“I was intrigued to find out how you stopped the peas from skiting off the turntable as it spun at 45 rpm,” says Gordon.

Clarity was provided when his daughter explained that it was a couple of 2p coins that did the trick.

Mind your language

LINGUISTICALLY-ASTUTE reader Martin Herman explains the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac: “A literalist takes things literally. A kleptomaniac takes things, literally.”

Not so handy

ENTERING a local supermarket, reader Malcolm Boyd observed a fellow shopper applying the hand gel supplied by the store.

“I didn’t think it would provide him much protection,” says Malcolm. “He was wearing gloves.”

In the shade

WE’RE discussing the redoubtable Dolly Parton, whose musical, 9 to 5, is currently playing in Glasgow’s King’s Theatre.

The queen of country crooning is an intelligent, dynamic and entrepreneurial woman, who writes her own songs and even built a theme park based on her upbringing and fame. Though she doesn’t take herself too seriously and gets a chuckle out of the saucy, seaside postcard stage persona she has nurtured over the years.

Which is why we think she would enjoy this comment from Russell Smith from Largs…

“I’ve been told,” he says, “that Dolly Parton’s chiropodist is the only man in California who doesn’t have a suntan.”

Twisty-turny tale

“MY mother got a part-time job in a pretzel factory,” says reader Roddy Young. “Just to make ends meet.”

Read more: Meme of the Day