Keaton eatin’
MOVIE star Michael Keaton has been enjoying some scoff in Glasgow Italian restaurant La Lanterna. Keaton, who played Batman in two flicks in the 80s and 90s, is reprising the role in Batgirl, currently filming in Glasgow.
At least we now know where a certain superhero goes to eat his dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner… Batman!
(Oh, please yourselves.)
Baconish bloke
WE continue discussing those unfortunate folk who are saddled with unusual names. David Waters from Blackwood says: “In the course of my work I visited a man, Herr Tinns, who worked in the town of Hamm in Germany. Thus, when people asked where I had been, I was able to answer truthfully that I had been to see Tinns of Hamm.”
Night moves
PHILOSOPHICALLY-MINDED Ian Noble from Carstairs Village has been speculating about one of the great mysteries that even our finest scholars have been unable to explain.
“Why do they put pockets in pyjama trousers?” muses Ian.
Special K
A FISHY tale in the Diary reminds Robin Mather from Musselburgh of the chap who was asked by a chum to name three types of fish that begin and end with the letter K.
The fellow thought this over before eventually offering:
1) Killer shark.
2) Kwik Save haddock.
3) Kilmarnock.
When his chum objected to the third example, he merely replied with a smirk: “Well, it’s a plaice.”
Russian home
A DIARY yarn about a family squabble reminds Gordon Fisher from Stewarton of a morning in Glasgow Central, when he sat across from a mother and her young son.
The little fellow seemed upset, with puckered lip, folded arms and back haughtily turned towards mum.
"Straighten your face… or else!" barked his peeved parent.
The face wasn’t straightened, so "or else" was brought into play. Like a bold Joe Biden standing up to Vladimir Putin, mum snarled: “We're not going to your gran's then."
And how did Putin Jnr. react to this painful news?
He unfolded his arms, jumped up from his seat and swaggered off across the concourse with a triumphant: "Right, let's go home then."
Meals on wheels
DUNDEE actor Gordon Morris reports on a boy on a bus he was travelling on who was exuberantly selling three steaks and a bottle of Captain Morgan rum for a tenner, using the persuasive sales pitch: "Totally legit."
An impressed Gordon says: “It’s like some kind of number 22 bus meal-deal.”
Celtic connection
“MY grandma is 80% Irish,” says reader Ben Hulme. “People call her Iris.”
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