THE Diary usually avoids those divisive topics that look certain to start the next world war. So you will rarely catch us discussing whether the UN should ban the cruel and inhumane sequin mines of Bolivia that provide Strictly Come Dancing with all those spangly bits and bobs that are glued to ballgowns and toreador trousers.
However, just for once we are prepared to dip a nervous toenail in risky waters by discussing that most volatile of modern talking points.
For reader Brian Chrystal notes that the person speaking on behalf of the Church of England, who is currently in a wrangle about its approach to transgender matters, is the aptly named Chief Education Officer… Nigel Genders.
More river ramblings
WE are celebrating the 20th anniversary of Scottish soap opera River City by suggesting episode ideas for the show’s future.
“In the current economic climate,” says reader Gordon McRae, “a number of the Shieldinch denizens decide to emigrate to pastures new, to the background music of We'll Meet Again.”
Gordon says this particular episode should be titled… VeraCity.
Fruity faux pas
THE six-year-old daughter of reader Kim Walker sampled a fruit at school she had never previously eaten.
Kim asked what it was.
“Flamangos,” came the knowledgeable reply.
Dreamy tech talk
WHEN people reach a certain age they would rather be cutting hedge than cutting edge. Though Malcolm Boyd’s nearest and dearest refuse to allow him that small luxury.
“Though I’m getting on a bit,” says Malcolm, from Milngavie, “my family tell me I should keep up to speed with new technologies. So I try an App every afternoon.”
Chameleon circuit
“PETS don’t have a nuanced understanding of clothes,” points out reader Henry Watson. “So they probably think their owners just change colour every day.”
Bum’s the word
OBSERVANT Ian Craig, from Strathaven, noticed that the department responsible for colonoscopies at Hairmyres Hospital, East Kilbride, is referred to as the Vanguard Unit.
Says Ian: “Surely it would be more apt to call it the Rearguard Unit.”
Fungal fumble
ON a bus into Glasgow city centre, reader Barry Stewart heard two experts on advanced economics discussing financial matters.
“I’ve been hearin’ about these non-fungible tokens on Facebook,” said one chap. “But I’ve no idea what it’s all about.”
“Dinnae know what the tokens are,” conceded the other financial expert. “But non-fungible means it isnae a mushroom.”
Bookending
A SAD tale of literary loss from reader Jennifer Shields, who says: “When I started my Book Exchange Club I had great expectations. Not any more.”
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