SO we got through the painful process together, yet again. Nonsense was talked, questions about the nation’s future were left unanswered, ballot papers were counted, and miraculously, we haven’t ended up with Donald Trump, Joe Biden or Kim Jong Un being given the keys to Number 10.
In other words, the British General Election was a roaring success.
Here are the highlights…
Daffy double act
POLITICS is about working well with colleagues. (When you’re not stabbing them in the back, that is.) Reader Barrie Crawford had an inspired idea for a winning collaboration between the SNP and Labour.
“I noticed that Grant Costello was standing for the SNP in the East Kilbride constituency,” he said. “Which made me wonder if the Labour Party missed a trick by not getting Diane Abbott to stand against him.”
Dog day afternoon
THE SNP’s leader in the House of Commons, Stephen Flynn, was spotted on the afternoon of the election with his pet pooch, Angus, outside the local polling station.
But did the mutt get to vote, we wondered. And, if so, does he share the same political affiliations as his master?
One chap on social media was highly suspicious of Angus’s chances of being allowed to put his cross (or paw print) on a ballot paper, and enquired: “Has he got ID?”
Talking balls
SCOTTISH comedian Ray Bradshaw took his 93-year-old mum to vote.
In a loud voice she said: “Which box for an enquiry into why James Forrest got no minutes at the Euros?”
A cheer went up from waiting voters. At last, something everyone could agree on.
The bald truth
THE things those wily politicians will do to get attention.
At one point during his colourful election campaign, SNP leader John Swinney hit the streets to meet the public while sporting a pair of wacky yellow sunglasses.
Not everyone was impressed with this theatrical attempt at sartorial elegance.
On social media one astonished critic studied John’s shiny dome of a head, and brave tilt at rock star glamour, then concluded: “Thought that was Right Said Fred.”
Another commentator was equally harsh, snickering: “Looks like a washed up 80s synth-popper.”
Taking the Michael
OBSERVANT Graeme Arnott from Stewarton noticed an unfortunate typo where the former Conservative MP for Surrey Heath was misnamed Michael Give.
Mused Graeme: “With the tax burden under the Conservatives rising to its highest level in 70 years, perhaps a more accurate renaming would be Michael Take.”
Monstrous accusation
IT’S not often that our new PM Sir Keir Starmer is compared to Scotland’s most bashful longtime resident.
But it happened in this election cycle, when Doctor Who scriptwriter and political commentator Gareth Roberts noted: “The Bermuda Triangle, the Loch Ness Monster, Atlantis – all baffling and beguiling. Starmer is surely the first great mystery to be really boring.”
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